Score: 9

"Refreshing..."

submission: Zombie Q

date: July 30, 2009

I like the flash, overall.

The animation is fluid, no noticeable glitches anywhere. There isn't much audio, but what is there is well placed and fits perfectly with the animation.

Although, I am curious as to HOW he killed a zombie with a bread slicer, but I'm not complaining. There's few enough zombie works on this site without discouraging the artists.

Overall, I give this a 9 out of 10. Keep up the good work.

Zero

Score: 0

"Boring..."

submission: Brawl Funnies [Dick 1]

date: May 7, 2009

It seems this flash was made entirely to make people hate it. Yes, to all my fellow critics, when you think about that one aspect, this flash was successful. After all, it made it to the front page.

It's a flash everyone loves to hate, which generates viewers who want to see it, just to rant about how bad it is. Not a bad strategy.

As previously mentioned, the only part of this animation remotely worth the time it took to watch a few minutes of this was the first animation. Colourful, vibrant, alive! Perfect synchronization between the music and the characters. Bravo, truly, bravo.

As for the rest, the animation was lacking, pathetic in most parts. However, I could tell even from the first few minutes that this flash was never meant to entertain it's masses. It's merely meant as hate mail against several of the flash artists mentioned in the flash itself. Yeah you don't like these people. Big deal...

To all those who have yet to watch this, I can only suggest that you watch the first few minutes, once the music cuts off, make friends with the little "X" on the top right corner of the screen. It's not worth the few minutes of your life you could waste by watching this.

To the artists (not including the first artist), I suggest taking some time to improve your animation. Yes, I know, you just wanted to insult the people you see as "sell outs' but even the most basic of insults is better formed than this. Personally, i think you can do better.

Music is a wonderful addition to any flash, the right music can make or break it. I suggest you take a leaf out of the first artist's book, and improve the sound quality. Even the recorded voices made my speakers rattle and my ears bleed.

I sincerely hope that for me, and my fellow critics, you put a bit more effort into your next collab. Even insults must be watchable, because if no one wants to watch your insults, you will have just wasted your time...

Looking forward to major improvements in the quality of your work...

Sincerely,

Zero

Score: 10

"Hilarious..."

submission: Charlie the Unicorn 3

date: April 7, 2009

As usual, nothing but high quality from the Charlie the Unicorn series.

Masterful animation and audio work truly showcase the skills of a superb artist.

And, as always, fresh, absurd humor packed in every second. (Kudos on the pokemon-esque sea creature rap.)

Overall, a ten out of ten. Well deserved, I might add.

Keep up the good work.

Zero

Score: 10

"Delicious..."

submission: Lilium -Teaser-

date: February 28, 2009

You never cease to amaze, my friend.

The use of color throughout your flash, and later on, the lack thereof is simply fantastic. I could tell you spent a while on each scene lovingly crafting the settings. The sky was a magnificent job.

You did a wonderful job bringing a previously immobile character to life, and doing it with such little movement, it holds true to the stylings of your former work. It's hard to understand, i know, but it begs to be said that while you do have little movement to speak of, it bring Lillium a new dimension of existence. The windmill could use a little work though, it seems a bit laggy from my end. Maybe that's just me.

And I see you've finally given her a voice. It fits her. Well done.

The music is, as always, masterfully chosen and imposed into the work. Who is it? I'd love to get my hands on this copy as well.

Once again, you fail to disappoint, Emi. I can say that, honestly, you've turned this critic into a fan.

I look forward to seeing more of your work. Well done.

Zero

Score: 8

"Fascinating..."

submission: No Mercy For The Damned

date: February 27, 2009

Dark and sinister, yet with an oddly innocent quality about it.

You had huge contrasts in colors (which is good), which kept forcing me to change my perspective on the scenes. I had to watch this 3 times to get the whole picture, and I love it.

The voice acting is genius, but there were a few issues.

You need to balance the voices, music, and sound effects better. There were times when the music and sound effects obscured Blithe's voice, thereby making me watch it a few more times to get it all. The scrolling text near the end is a bit large and hard to read.

Overall, this flash is fantastic. I look forward to the launch of this series.

Zero

Score: 10

"Stunning...."

submission: Lilium

date: February 27, 2009

Tragically beautiful. These are the words that come to mind.

Utterly unique. The lack of conventional animation forces the viewer to take in the full view of each slide. I found my eyes scanning every scene as though it were a feast and I were starving.

The main character is gorgeous in all senses of the word. Majestically portrayed as though she truly was the flower, I felt as though I wasn't looking at a little girl, but something more.

The music was picked well. I'd love to get my hands on a copy. My ears were devouring each note.

The storyline, above all, is the main event. Unique, fresh, tragic, all can be used to describe the story.

I found a few issues, but all were accounted for in your author's notes above. All are negligible annoyances.

Overall, this flash is truly a masterpiece. One of the best I've seen, and will probably define the genre of Gothic Flash for years.

You should be proud. I look forward to seeing more of your work very soon.

Zero

Score: 0

"Boring..."

submission: The Emo Kit

date: February 27, 2009

I refuse to comment on the obvious excessive nature of your chosen... subject. I feel it would go in one ear and out the other.

If this is supposed to be an insult it's a very poor one.

The "voice acting" was so high pitched and irksome, I literally had to mute my computer to stop the headaches. I suggest using a real person (or someone with a lower voice, whatever the case may be) next time.

The animation was... lazy. Yeah, the keyhole was moving, but not much else. It seems as though you did this in 5 minutes. Try using a lot more movement next time.

Another thing... there was no buildup, whatsoever. The flash started and it was simply a wall of expletives straight until the end. I had to fight to stay awake.

Remember that a good story, even a good joke, goes somewhere. This flash did not. I suggest spending some time actually writing out your plans before putting it into flash. This movie gives off the strong impression that something relating emos pissed you off, and instead of venting somehow, you decided to put a 3 minute long hate message on this website.

Overall, I think you can do better, much better...

Zero

Score: 8

"Unexpected..."

submission: Don't Be Emo

date: February 27, 2009

Not bad. I like the joke, didn't see it coming...

The animation was different from what I'm used to. Could have used some work in the beginning, but overall not bad.

All in all, a decent piece of work. Good job.

Zero

Score: 5

"Unintelligable...."

submission: An Emo's Tale

date: February 27, 2009

I can't understand a single word of it. It all sounds like the adults from the old charlie brown cartoons. Maybe you have interference with your Microphone, maybe it's my speakers, I'm not sure...

The animation was very.... drab. I can tell you can do better. Even with the limited emo pallate (black, grey, purple, white, dark blues and reds), you have a huge spectrum of color to use.

There's no change, whatsoever. You need to work on your storylines a bit more before you put it into flash.

Overall, I think you can do better...

Zero

Score: 6

"Lacking"

submission: God Damn Emo Kids

date: February 27, 2009

The animation was alright, but the joke was a bit short for my taste.
What? He gets shot? That's it?
I like the effort in the music and animation, no glitches as far as I can see, but the storyline (Or the punchline in this case) could use some work. Please try to work on that next time.

Zero